Thursday

Greenpeace.... WHERE ARE YOU?


Much was made of NYC banning transfats in restaurants, a groundbreaking intrusion of dietism into the free enterprise world. The banning of smoking in public went over rather easily a decade ago, its negative impact more or less proven by assent, (and a successful near-billion dollar class action suit). We await the next lifestyle pogrom, and earnestly hope it bans only those activities we ourselves avoid. Seeing as all the broken limbs, fostbitten extremities, and a gaggle of participant deaths recently, have set the stage for "A Perfect Banning", it remains only for the Pelosista hordes to caucus, and rid America of the scourge of mountain climbing. Mountain climbing, mountain biking, mountain skiing, mountain leveling, and mountain-purchasing ought to be thrown in the pot, too. Thus can we save the mountains. See how it works? We ban, we save. It's easy. Mindless, even. The banning of alcohol would be a good second-next, if it wasn't for the fact that it was tried, and made things worse. What a fine world it could be without all the nasty drunks beating spouses, and killing innocents on the roads. I guess we're kinda stuck with the drunks, the DWI events, the endless rehab costs, and even the liver surgery bills, which come into play only at the endstage.

Funny thing about banning. The Islamics banned alcohol 1000 years ago, and made it stick. (except for during Ramadan, and only after sundown). So you never get 100% from a good banning, I suppose. You see, its the escape clause that makes it workable, and aiming for 1000% would have ruined everything. Deuced clever, those Muslim rulemakers, truly cognizant of human limitations! When 'Greenpeace Incorporated' sends its attack boats up the Hudson to ban our local power plant, I'm hoping they recall the "Ramadan Exclusion", and let us use nuclear power for at least the sweltering July-August dog days, and maybe for the December blow-up-yard-decoration fest, a simple-minded but happy aberration, somewhat beloved of non-Marxists, and now attracting world interest in its various guises as Chanukka, Kwanzaa, and even the agnostic "Festivus".

Yes, a few simple exclusions, like for instance, maybe allowing Hudson Valley Hospital Emergency Room to continue to use nuclear power, (seeing as Entergy donated the place to us 2 years ago) might make the "No Nukes" pill go down a little easier! I hope the "Masters of Banning" remember to keep Valhalla prison on good steady nuke power, seeing as a blackout there might release a horde of banned individuals back out among us, unwanted. We definitely would not want THAT!

With all the right exclusions in place (let's say--- RFK jr's manse at Howland's Lake, Andy Spano's digs, and sloop Clearwater's dock burglar alarm), the stage could be set for Westchesterites to "bite the bullet" and go non-nuclear at last!

I can't wait!

Greenpeace..... WHERE ARE YOU?